Being the Same Will Not Do

Why Pruning Matters…

My favorite flowers are Tulips. But I especially love Peonies and Hydrangeas. Fortunately, #TraderJoes keeps a nice stock of fresh flowers and I travel there almost weekly. Though I love flowers, I am a *clears throat * low activity individual when it comes for the care that fresh flowers require. On my last trip to TJ’s, I bought two bunches of Hydrangeas, filled a vase with water, and thought…water is water, they will be fine. Next day, they looked tired, weak, and were hanging over.

Environment: Airy space, fresh water, and even the powdery nutrient filled substance.

However, I did not prune. Did not take away the old stuff. The flowers ability to thrive was based upon itself. I did not give the flower what it needed to thrive in this new environment. My husband gently said “we must prune so that the flowers can grow”. And without request, he did it. The flowers are now growing.

Sometimes, we ask ourselves or aloud “why stay in the environment” that did not or does not serve you? Removing any level of abuse, sometimes there are other questions to ponder. What must I learn here? What pruning must be done for me so that I may thrive in the environment that I am destined to blossom in? Not all places are intended to harm, but perhaps position to teach. Only you will now that for you.

Teach what? Especially when you are stressed and the walls of challenge are getting taller and thicker. Here’s what I did. I prayed. I got quiet. Honestly, I am still in this place of quiet (believe it or not). I asked not that stress be taken away, but that I would grow and that those things that bothered me would grow me. That my coping strategies would grow to meet the challenges around me. That I built boundaries so that my relationships and family would not feel my burden and that I no longer fill the room with my woes. In a sense, I needed to improve me.

There is a song I remember as a child in church. To sum, it talks about how every ’round goes higher and higher’ . And then #Erykah Badu talked about the harm of being a bag lady. It is true that being burdened by things is a call to live above the fray and then decide.

Decide what? Who you will be in the moment. And how you will proceed.

I get the discussion about Burnout. I understand it fully. But here’s the thing, what is the lesson so that the burnout is lessened? My sister calls it being aware and taking the time for introspection. Talk about it. But be discerning about who, when, and where. Sometimes clinical licenses to support may be as necessary as the friend (who is for you).

But being the same…on the other side of any challenge (work, professional burnout, personal revelation, transition, pandemic). We are not the same people who entered. We are different. Honor that new part of you.

Learn as you prune. And in those moments that you cannot prune for yourself, be in the company of others who will be there for you gently.

Let’s Lift as We Grow


Photo by Gaetano Cessati on Unsplash

%d bloggers like this: